The Last Stand & The Help

RT - Going Bonkers?

Recreation - The Girl With the Dtagon Tattoo

RT - Levels of Commitment

Levels of Commitment. Where are you?

These levels of commitment are something to pay attention to in regards to any part of life…relationships, personal health & wellness, business, work, attitude, beliefs, and on and on.

5 Levels of Commitment:

1. I don’t want to commit. (I don’t want to be here and you can’t help me)
2. I want the result/outcome, but I don’t want to put in any effort.
3. I’ll try. I might. I could.
4. I’ll do my best.
5. I do whatever whatever it takes.

When you set goals for yourself, it’s always important to check with yourself the level of commitment you are willing to put in. Goals setting fails when we lost commitment. Therefore, every now and then, it’s good for you to check on yourself which stage of commitment you are in. This may be the reason why you are not producing the result you want in life. By being in level 5 of commitment, you are at your best mental state. In fact, you have won half of the battle!

Is what I am doing getting me what I want or likely to get me where I want to be? If “No,” remember, we all have choices on what thoughts and actions we take. If what I’m doing isn’t working, I need to get busy doing something else.

The Blind Men and the Elephant

It was six men of Indostan
To learning much inclined,
Who went to see the Elephant
(Though all of them were blind),
That each by observation
Might satisfy his mind

The First approached the Elephant,
And happening to fall
Against his broad and sturdy side,
At once began to bawl:
"God bless me! but the Elephant
Is very like a wall!"

The Second, feeling of the tusk,
Cried, "Ho! what have we here
So very round and smooth and sharp?
To me 'tis mighty clear
This wonder of an Elephant
Is very like a spear!"

The Third approached the animal,
And happening to take
The squirming trunk within his hands,
Thus boldly up and spake:
"I see," quoth he, "the Elephant
Is very like a snake!"

The Fourth reached out an eager hand,
And felt about the knee.
"What most this wondrous beast is like
Is mighty plain," quoth he;
" 'Tis clear enough the Elephant
Is very like a tree!"

The Fifth, who chanced to touch the ear,
Said: "E'en the blindest man
Can tell what this resembles most;
Deny the fact who can
This marvel of an Elephant
Is very like a fan!"

The Sixth no sooner had begun
About the beast to grope,
Than, seizing on the swinging tail
That fell within his scope,
"I see," quoth he, "the Elephant
Is very like a rope!"

And so these men of Indostan
Disputed loud and long,
Each in his own opinion
Exceeding stiff and strong,
Though each was partly in the right,
And all were in the wrong!

Moral:

So oft in theologic wars,
The disputants, I ween,
Rail on in utter ignorance
Of what each other mean,
And prate about an Elephant
Not one of them has seen!


_____________________
American poet John Godfrey Saxe (1816-1887) based this poem, on a fable that was told in India many years ago. It is a good warning about how our sensory perceptions can lead to some serious misinterpretations; especially when the investigations of the component parts of a whole, and their relations in making up the whole, are inadequate and lack co-ordination.

Funny Quotes

• Any book worth banning is a book worth reading.


• Christianity might be a good thing if anyone ever tried it. - G.B. Shaw


• When shit becomes valuable, the poor will be born without assholes. - Henry Miller


• America: The Land of Opportunism


• Save Your Breath ... You'll need it to blow up your date!


• Why is American beer served cold? So you can tell it from urine. - David Moulton


• You can only be young once, but you can be immature forever.


• If electricity is produced by electrons, is morality produced by morons?


• Gravity - It's not just a good idea, it's the Law! - NASA briefing slide


• Ignorance killed the cat. Curiosity was framed.


• Gravity is a myth, the Earth sucks.


• Jesus loves you. Everyone else thinks you're an asshole.


• Living on Earth may be expensive, but it includes an annual free trip around the Sun.


• Hell is other people. - Jean-Paul Sartre


• Christmas is at our throats again. - Noel Coward, annual holiday card


• I don't know whether the world is run by smart people who are putting us on, or by imbeciles who really mean it.


• People are more violently opposed to fur than leather because it's safer to harass rich women than motorcycle gangs.


• There's a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot. - Steven Wright


• Despite the high cost of living it remains a popular item. - unknown


• Thanks to the Interstate Highway System, it is now possible to travel from coast to coast without seeing anything. - Charles Kuralt


• Drawing on my fine command of the English language, I said nothing. - Robert Benchley


• I know only two tunes: one of them is "Yankee Doodle" and the other one isn't. - Ulysses S. Grant


• Madness takes its toll. Please have exact change.


• It infuriates me to be wrong when I know I'm right. - Moliere


• California is a fine place to live - if you happen to be an orange. - Fred Allen


• The gene pool could use a little chlorine.


• We live in an age when pizza gets to your home before the police. - Jeff Marder


• They laughed at Joan of Arc, but she went right ahead and built it. - Gracie Allen


• Do I mind if you smoke? I don't give a shit if you burn to the ground!


• Smoking areas in restaurants are like peeing areas in swimming pools.


• What is originality? Undetected plagiarism.


• Consistency is the last resort of the unimaginative.


• Experience is one thing you can't get for nothing.


• The cynic knows the price of everything and the value of nothing. - Oscar Wilde?


• Football incorporates the two worst elements of American society: violence punctuated by committee meetings. - George F. Will


• For people who like peace and quiet: a phoneless cord.


• Life is sexually transmitted.


• If people were meant to go around naked, they would have been born that way. - Playboy


• It's hard to work in groups when you're omnipotent. - Q., Star Trek, the Next Generation


• I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by. - Douglas Adams


• I can please only one person per day. Today is not your day. And tomorrow isn't looking good either.


• Always remember to pillage BEFORE you burn.


• Make it idiot-proof and someone will make a better idiot.


• A flashlight is a case for holding dead batteries.


• Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off now.


• Given a fifty-fifty chance, you will be wrong 90% of the time.


• IRS: We've got what it takes to take what you've got.


• Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.


• He who laughs last thinks slowest.


• Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.


• A closed mouth gathers no foot.


• A good scapegoat is hard to find.


• Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.


• I used to have a handle on life, then it broke.


• When there's a will, I want to be in it.


• We have enough youth, how about a fountain of smart?


• Give me ambiguity or give me something else.


• "Criminal lawyer" is a redundancy.


• If we aren't supposed to eat animals, why are they made of meat?


• Red meat isn't bad for you. Fuzzy, blue-green meat is bad for you.


• Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them?

Stupidity Quotes

• Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups. - unknown


• Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so. - Douglas Adams (1952-2001)


• It is difficult to get a man to understand something when his salary depends on his not understanding it. - Upton Sinclair


• Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools, because they have to say something. - Plato


• There is nothing more frightful than ignorance in action. - Goethe


• 'Tis better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than open one's mouth and remove all doubt. - Samuel Johnson


• A great many open minds should be closed for repairs. - Toledo Blade


• A great many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices. - William James


• Nobody ever went broke by underestimating the intelligence or taste of the American public. - HL Mencken and/or PT Barnum


• Never attribute to malice what can be adequately explained by stupidity. - Nick Diamos


• Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former. - Albert Einstein


• Never argue with a fool, people might not know the difference. - unknown


• Any fool can make a rule, and any fool will mind it. - Henry David Thoreau


• Nothing in all the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity. - Martin Luther King, Jr.


• I have great faith in fools; My friends call it self-confidence. - Edgar Allen Poe


• The two most common things in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity. - Frank Zappa


• Stupidity has a certain charm -- ignorance does not. - Frank Zappa


• The next time I send a damn fool on an errand, I'll go myself. - Dan Stole


• Blessed is the man who, having nothing to stay, abstains from giving us worthy evidence of the fact. - George Eliot


• Why do most people think their own impoverished lives must be the norm of the universe? - Poul Anderson


• Dullard: Someone who looks up a thing in the encyclopedia, turns directly to the entry, reads it, and then closes the book. - Philip Jose Farmer [substitute above: Google, Fox News, or any other single source for "encyclopedia"]


• A certain combination of incompetence and indifference can cause almost as much suffering as the most acute malevolence. - Bruce Catton, A Stillness at Appomattox, (1953)


• Any sufficiently advanced incompetence is indistinguishable from malice. - unknown


• Every absurdity has a champion to defend it. - unknown


• Everyone is entitled to be stupid, but some abuse the privilege.


• Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.


• It has been said that thousands of monkeys banging on keyboards would produce the complete works of Shakespeare. The internet has proven this to be untrue.


• You can fool too many of the people too much of the time. - James Thurber

Recreation - books - Seth Grahame-Smith

RT - The Paradoxical Commandments

This intervention is based on the work of Dr. Kent M. Keith - The Paradoxical Commandments. Wonderful words to try to live by, but how to talk through them to better understand the concepts? The following are questions that include words and concepts from the book "Anyway." The intervention is a work in progress - the questions will likely change with each discussion.



The Paradoxical Commandments by Dr. Kent M. Keith
(Questions generated from: “Anyway - The Paradoxical Commandments - Finding Personal Meaning in a Crazy World”)

People are illogical, unreasonable, and self-centered.
Love them anyway.
• What does it mean to be illogical, unreasonable and self centered?
• Why are people illogical, unreasonable and self centered?
• Can you think of examples when you were illogical, unreasonable or self centered?
• Can you think of examples when you were unlovable?
• How do we love someone even when they act unlovable?
• What is unconditional love?
• Does unconditional love exist?
• Are some people more worthy than others?
• Does love begat love?
• What do we get by giving to others?
• Elephant story page 24

If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish ulterior motives.
Do good anyway.
• What do the words “ulterior motives” mean to you? (ulterior – hidden, intentionally kept concealed, lying beyond what is evident)
• What are some examples of ulterior motives?
• What good deeds have you done that others accused you of ulterior motives?
• Why do we accuse people of ulterior motives?
• When someone accuses us of ulterior motives, why should we do good anyway?

If you are successful, you will win false friends and true enemies.
Succeed anyway.
• What is a “true enemy?”
• What is a “false friend?”
• Have you had friends (or family) that abandoned you when you have succeeded or changed for the better?
• What are ways people attack other people?
• What are ways to deal with people who attack you?
• What do we learn from people who attack us or other people?
• What does it mean to have vision?
• Why should we succeed anyway?

The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow.
Do good anyway.
• What is some good you have done that has been recognized?
• Will/has the examples been forgotten?
• What is some good you have done that has not been recognized?
• Is doing good for the sake of good enough?
• What have you accomplished because of the work or efforts of others?
• What are some little things that we can do that bring a smile or lift the spirits of others? (Nice list page 50)
• Why do good even if it will be forgotten tomorrow?
[It is amazing how much can be accomplished when you don’t worry about who gets the credit.]

Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable.
Be honest and frank anyway.
• Can someone be “too polite?”
• What do “honesty” and “trust” have to do with each other?
• What builds trust?
• Can you build trust by hiding your feelings, your thoughts, your hopes, your fears?
• What are some right and wrong times to say certain things?
• Are there some things that should never be said?
• Why aren’t people more honest and frank? (It makes you vulnerable)
• What good can come from being vulnerable? (A suit of armor protects you by containing you, you can only grow so much.)
• Do it make it the truth just because someone says it’s the truth? (elephant story)

The biggest men and women with the biggest ideas can be shot down by the smallest men and women with the smallest minds.
Think big anyway.
• What does it mean to be a “big person?” (Generous, principled, committed and open to thinking and acting in new ways to solve problems and seize opportunities.)
• Why do we need big people?
• What is a “small person?” (Sees things in terms of his or her own power or comfort or convenience, and believes that what is best for him or her is best for the family or organization or community.)
• Why not just go along with the small people?
• Don’t big ideas generate big failures?
• What is “vision?”
• Can you think of examples of big ideas that changed the world?
• How can I think big, I’m no big shot?

People favor underdogs but follow only top dogs.
Fight for a few underdogs anyway.
• Why do we cheer for the underdog?
• Why, when it is our own family, our own career, or our own reputation that is at stake, we usually don’t take the risk?

What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight.
Build anyway.
• What lasts?
• Why build sand castles knowing the tide will take them?
• Is the joy, the meaning, the satisfaction in the building?

People really need help but may attack you if you do help them.
Help people anyway.
• What de we get out of helping others?
• Why don’t people ask for help, even when they obviously need it?
• What should you do if someone attacks you when you are trying to help?
• How can someone provide the wrong help or provide the help in a wrong way?
• What are the best ways to ask for help?
• What are the best ways to give help? (Support their dignity and preserve their options.)
• If you are attacked when you are trying to help another, what could be some reasons why?

Give the world the best you have and you'll get kicked in the teeth.
Give the world the best you have anyway.
• What does “give it your best” mean?
• What are the costs of giving it your best?
• What are the costs of not giving it your best?
• What kind of person doesn’t give his or her best?
• Why does anybody hold back?
• Don’t we always do the best we can at the time?
• What does tact, strategy and timing have to do with doing your best?
• How do we seize opportunities or create opportunities to give our best?
• What is something you can be doing that represents your best right now?

The Paradoxical Commandments by Dr. Kent M. Keith
© Copyright Kent M. Keith 1968, renewed 2001

RT - wellness bracketology

The inspiration for this intervention is from the book "The Final Four of Everything."

The process - 1. discuss concepts of wellness, the dimensions, interconnectedness, definitions... 2. brainstorm for lists of activities in categories of physical, emotional, social and spiritual wellness. 3. from each list pick by consensus the top eight. 4. place those top 8 in each section of a 32 team tournament bracket. 5. decide by consensus and discussion which wellness activity is "better", until a winner is identified.

The process allows for brainstorming, discussion of concepts of wellness, opportunity to discuss specific enriching activities, and often fun and poignant.

The last time I did this intervention with a group here was our final four: physical wellness = sleep, social wellness = companionship, emotional wellness = laughter, spiritual wellness = support groups. The finals were companionship vs. laughter...the "commissioner" called it a tie.

Harvey Quote

RT - bank of time

RT - carpenter's story

RT - changeling eagle

RT - tomb inscription

The following words were inscribed on the tomb of an Anglican bishop in Westminster Abby (1100 A.D.)

When I was young and free and my imagination had not limits, I dreamed of changing the world. As I grew older and wiser, I discovered the world would not change, so I shortened my sights somewhat and decided to change only my country.

But, it, too, seemed immovable.

As I grew into my twilight years, in one last desperate attempt, I settled for changing only my family, those closest to me, but alas, they would have none of it.

And now as I lie on my deathbed, I suddenly realize: If I had only changed myself first, then by example I would have changed my family.

From their inspiration and encouragement, I would then have been able to better my country, and, who knows, I may have even changed the world.

RT - success

Bessie Stanley's

Famous

Poem

Lincoln Sentinel, Nov. 30, 1905

"What Constitutes Success"

A $250 Prize Story by a Lincoln Woman

A few weeks ago Mrs. A.J. Stanley at the earnest solicitation of Mr. Stanley wrote an essay on "What constitutes success" for entrance in a contest carried on by the George Livingston Richards Co. of Boston, Mass. It was required that the essay should be confined to 100 words and should be the best definition of what constituted success, neatness and several of the requirements being taken into consideration. The essay was entered in competition with hundreds of others from all parts of the country. Last Saturday when Mrs. Stanley was notified that she had won the first prize of $250 she did not credit the good news and laughing told Mr. Stanley he could have half. An accompanying draft furnished satisfactory proof. Below we give Mrs. Stanley’s essay on "What Constitutes Success."

"He has achieved success who has lived well, laughed often and loved much; who has gained the respect of intelligent men and the love of little children; who has filled his niche and accomplished his task; who has left the world better than he found it, whether by an improved poppy, a perfect poem, or a rescued soul; who has never lacked appreciation of earth’s beauty or failed to express it; who has always looked for the best in others and given them the best he had; whose life was an inspiration; whose memory a benediction."

RT - H.A.L.T.

A typical AA slogan is the basis for this intervention: "Don't get too hungry, angry, lonely of tired."

RT - share, tell cards

Published "share" cards or "tell" cards or "chat-a-chini" and others offer an opportunity to safely share and be listened to.

RT - stressors, symptoms, coping skills

Brainstorming:

"Things I believe cause stress."

"How I know some one is stressed."

"What can help."

Lots of opportunities to discuss the power of belief in regards to stressors, signs and symptoms and then positive coping skills/strategies/actions.

RT - healthy habits

Completing this form helps illustrate areas to work on.

RT - self esteem

"On a scale of 1-10, where do you put your self esteem?"

"Has it been better (and worse) and why?"

"What is self esteem?"

Participants complete this unscientific self esteem test and discuss each item. The items are repeated in more negative term on the top, more positive ways on the lower 10 items.

RT - feelings and choice theory

Participants select from feelings cards (these as illustrated but divided into individual feelings)- "Pick 3 examples of feelings that you have had lately."

We then go over the illustration of the choice theory car to discuss that theory's general view of how thinking, actions, feelings and physiology are connected to wants.

Then in turn each identifies a feeling and we discuss what they were doing and thinking that that feeling resulted from as well as how their physiology reacted. Further discussion as to using that awareness to perhaps choose differently and what could be the different results. Different thoughts and actions can result in different feelings and physiology. Being aware of where those feelings and physical symptoms are coming from can aid in doing and thinking differently - and how our wants fit in.

RT - mistakes

We watched a copy of a broadcast from CBS Sunday morning about mistakes. Then completed part of this worksheet - typically just have participants fill out 3 examples of mistakes and what learned.

Typically some participants take a long time with the details of their mistakes, so the tearing up and throwing away all that effort can be dramatic.

I ended with the Famous Failures video.

Also used at time are mistakes quotes that participants read and if they choose, discuss.

Famous Failures

RT - stay out of hospital, rational thinking

Karen facilitated brainstorming and discussion of coping skills that can help keep one out of the hospital. The afternoon reviewed and discussed 3 "stinkin' thinkin'" self defeating thoughts.

The Ten Forms of Self Defeating Thoughts:

1. All or nothing - thinking

2. Overgeneralizatian

3. Mental filter

4. Discounting the positive

5. Jumping to conclusions

6. Magnification

7. Emotional reasoning

8. "Should statements"

9. Labeling

10.Personalization and blame

RT - famous people with mental illness

Karen facilitated a review of famous people who were/are mentally ill. Each participant randomly draws then reads a brief biography of each. Then in turn having each participant discuss what they would like to accomplish in their lives to be a success and what they are doing to accomplish.

Lots of resources on the topic including:

http://www.naminh.org/action-famous-people.php

www.mentalhealthministries.net/links_resources/flyers/famouspeople.pdf

http://www.nami.org/Template.cfm?Section=Helpline1&template=/ContentManagement/ContentDisplay.cfm&ContentID=4858

http://www.stampoutstigma.org/famous.html

RT - attitude game

The game Attitude! used to discuss many of the aspects of attitude. You can contact me about the game and see how to play at this You Tube site: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Iub74bt95Hc and http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Saa8Oa_I7AU

RT - positive psychology, signature strengths

Karen facilitated a couple of wonderful exercises on the topics of happiness and signature strengths.

The morning group discussed happiness and typical aspects of happy people. The afternoon group introduced signature strengths.

The positive psychology and signature strengths information found at www.authentichappiness.com. The handout used can be found at http://www.happinesshypothesis.com/strengths-self-rating-scale.doc.

The process today varied from the written instructions for identifying one's signature strengths. In our group the participants were instructed to just identify their top 5 signature strengths from the list; each participant was called upon to share their list of strengths and were asked to elaborate on (a) how they have expressed these strengths, and (b) looking to the future, will be using these strengths.

The positive nature of the activity made it very non threatening.

BLAISE PASCAL QUOTES

A few quotations attributed to Blaise Pascal (1623 – 1662) French mathematician, physicist and theologian:

People almost invariably arrive at their beliefs not on the basis of proof but on the basis of what they find attractive.

I would have written a shorter letter, but I did not have the time.

It is not permitted to the most equitable of men to be a judge in his own cause.

It is a funny sort of justice whose limits are marked by a river; true on this side of the Pyrenees, false on the other.

Justice is as much a matter of fashion as charm is.

Thinking too little about things or thinking too much both make us obstinate and fanatical.

Those who are clever in imagination are far more pleased with themselves than prudent men could reasonably be.

True morality makes fun of morality.

What amazes me the most is to see that everyone is not amazed at his own weakness.

Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious conviction.

Justice without force is powerless; force without justice is tyrannical.

It is man's natural sickness to believe that he possesses the Truth.

RECREATION - book - man's search for meaning

A book to read and re-read. Vicktor Frankl helps to make it quite clear that attitude is everything. No matter what the circumstances, we have a choice on how we react. They may even have our bodies but they can't take our minds.

The experiences of camp life show that man does have a choice of action. We who lived in concentration camps can remember the men who walked through the huts comforting others, giving away their last piece of bread. They may have been few in number, but they offer sufficient proof that everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms--to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way.

FAMILY - Sara the producer

Here's some of Sara's work for Legos.

RECREATION - book - what the dog saw

Just finished "What the Dog Saw" by Malcom Gladwell. Also the author of the Tipping Point and others. This one is a collection of his New Yorker writings. He is great at looking at his topics laterally. Each essay looks at interesting people in ways that compares and illustrates the topic in ways that surprise you.

INTRODUCTION

I hope to compartmentalize this blog into different categories such work/recreational therapy, family, recreation/interests, etc. so that if someone wants to jump to one category or another, they can easily.